This week, we’re writing 500 words about a time God showed up. That seems like such a strange topic in a way: I’m sure God has shown up more times than I can even count when I wasn’t aware of him doing anything. He’s moving all the time in ways we don’t see or comprehend, and if we did, we won’t understand. So I guess this is supposed to be about the time He showed up and we were actually aware of what was happening… which is probably a short list compared to what we aren’t aware of!
So here’s my story of God showing up. It’s not finished, and I don’t have all the insight I hope to have one day, but I know He’s rolling toward… something!
It’s about my job. To give you some background, my work life was on shifting sand for most of my 20s and on into my early 30s. I have a good degree, and I don’t think anyone would describe me as lazy or rebellious or reckless. Regardless, I have been THROUGH it in my worklife. Layoffs, let-go, passed over, hiring freeeze, disciplinary action, unwanted sexual advances, unemployment, working multiple jobs in addition to full-time work, re-organization (that’s the latest one): the only negative job scenario I haven’t faced is being replaced by cheaper labor over-seas or automation. It’s almost as bad as dating.
My current situtation has me and my whole department holding our breath. Several jobs are being moved to remote sites in south Alabama and east and southeast Georgia. One location is very close to my hometown, but after being here in the ‘Ham for nearly 6 years, I’m not feeling the onions any longer (the famous regional crop near my hometown of Vidalia). And then there’s a guy… *bats eyes*
Just looking at the numbers, there’s a 50% chance that my job will get moved to one of the sites and 75% chance it will get moved out of my department. But more importantly, there’s a 100% chance that, no matter what, my worklife is going to be turned upside down!
And honestly, I welcome it. When I can dial the fear and anxiety back enough to enjoy some perspective, I like those odds! No one wants to be miserable in their work, but I tell you, I’m close to that a healthy percentage of my days. How much of that is my own attitude, and how much is because things are objectively rough right now is anyone’s guess. But even though I’ve improved my attitude and redoubled my efforts, what I really need is for something good to work out. Something REALLY good.
And that’s where God comes in. My attempts at finding another job over the last three years have come to nothing. Granted, I have not attacked it with the zeal of a single mother (it’s just me and my cat, after all), but the point is, one door after another has closed, or more often I found them already closed and tried the lock to make sure before changing plans. At this point, God showing up IS my plan.
So I cried out to you, Lord, my only hiding place. You are all I have, my only hope in this life, my last chance for help. Psalm 142:5
To be continued…
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Joni Butler has called the ‘Ham home since 2012. Officially, she’s here for employment but has found a home here at Breath. Though an avid diarist for years, this is her first writing gig. Jesus is her best friend and she loves pursuing Him passionately. You can read more about Joni in her Breath Bio.