Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
You’ve heard it said, “You can’t trust anyone but yourself.” But is that actually true? There are several people/things in this world that I don’t trust. For example, I don’t trust our current presidential candidates, or people who seem too nice, and I definitely don’t trust valentines day candy (I have a theory that it’s all the Christmas candy that didn’t sell, repackaged).
So while I don’t trust those things among numerous others, I certainly do not trust myself. I think we can all agree that we’ve made our fair share of mistakes, and made decisions that we wish we could change. I mean, I’m only 19, I know this is NOT the end of my mistake making process, that I won’t suddenly be filled with wisdom and make all the right choices and God will think, “She doesn’t need me anymore, she is as wise as it gets!” Nope, I may struggle with my own faith some days, but I have 100% faith in my ability to screw up. So if I can’t trust anyone but myself, but then I also don’t trust myself..who do I trust? Well, there’s only one person – the author and creator of our lives.
When I graduated high school, I had every intention of going to college. It was the expectation, the rule, everyone went to college. I took all the AP classes I could, did extracurricular activities, applied to schools far and near, and got accepted to all of them. I could have gone, I could have taken out student loans and pursued degrees that didn’t matter to me, and I could have ignored God’s whisper that it wasn’t time yet. I’ve done that plenty, ignored God. Let me warn you, DON’T DO IT. God has a sense of humor my friends, and He will find a way to make sure you listen. At this point in life, I was done ignoring God’s calls, even if what He was asking me to do was scary. College to me was a safety net, a stepping stone to the next thing that would secure me a stable job and lifestyle. When God told me it wasn’t time, I’ll admit that I freaked out. “What will I do then? What will everyone think? How am I ever gonna get a stable job and live comfortably?” I was genuinely worried about my future, about my opportunities, forgetting that He was the author of my life, and that He had more opportunities for me than anyone else could offer.
It has now been a year since I’ve graduated high school, and I’m still listening for when God tells me it’s time to go, maybe He will, and maybe He won’t. But I can say now with 100% assurance, that I don’t mind what the call is. Throughout this year, I’ve found a completely new level of trust with God. Had I gone to college, and picked a major, and spent all my time and energy focused on that one thing, I never would have allowed God to do some major works in me. He has opened more doors for me than I could count, and has introduced me to so many things that I love. I couldn’t bear to part with the amazing women I’ve met at my job, or the ladies I write this blog with, or the girls I get to share Jesus with on Monday mornings. Because I gave something up, He gave me something even bigger in return. I may not see every step between my dream, and my dream come true, but I trust that God will get me there.
The truth is, you can’t trust yourself to get it all right, to pick the perfect job, or husband, or anything for that matter. If it’s all up to God in the end, why don’t we just give it to him in the beginning? So if you find that you can’t trust anyone, or even yourself, just trust Him. Even when it seems scary, jump off the cliff, enjoy the free fall, and let Him catch you. – Arrianna
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